The California King


Майкъл Кешмън


The California King is the largest and most comfortable bed in the world. Its place of origin in the United States, as the pinnacle of "conspicuous consumption", means that it has to be the biggest and best thing available anywhere. The bed measures 2 meters long by 2.13 meters wide and was engineered for the ever expanding U.S. consumer. It is designed for two large American adults, but could accommodate 3 Germans, 4 Mexicans, a Polish basketball player, the complete Nigerian national football team and their pets. All could easily lose sight and contact with each other on this expensively, expansive "island of comfort". The Mexicans wouldn’t even have to bother tethering their mules, nor the Nigerians' their goats and the Germans' dogs would also have plenty of room to wander about and explore. While the Polish Basketball player would have plenty of space in which to practice and not interfere with the excitable Nigerian footballers. Even the two average American adults could manage to get a good night's sleep by themselves provided they do some heavy spooning, but could still manage to not touch the sides of the luxurious bed in an area roughly the same size of an aircraft carrier's landing deck.

Only the most powerful country on the planet has the technology and resources to develop and build such a monstrously big piece of household furniture. Leave it to those nutty Californians to devise a bed that takes as much materials to construct as a two-story house. If the California King bed was converted into a boat, you could get half of Cuba safely to the U.S. shores in one easy trip. So, go on and find out for yourself how wonderful the mythos of the "American Dream" can truly be; provided you are fortunate enough to afford the world's largest bed in order to be able to have a splendid enough night's sleep to be able to make those dreams happen! Has the American Dream itself become just that?... A Dream...

August 2008